Heartbreak

Heartbreak isn’t what you think

It’s not an isolated event that only occurs at the termination of a relationship

Heartbreak is prolonged

Recurring

Debilitating

Shattering

It’ll make you lose hope in people

In promises

And in love

It occurs in the lies

In the fears that become reality

And in the future that doesn’t exist

It occurs in the happiness they find without you

In memories that now seem a betrayal

And in the words that become unfulfilled promises

It thrives on the painful realisations that

You weren’t who you thought you were to them

And you weren’t ever going to be enough

All because you weren’t her

Heartbreak lingers

It follows you

Tainting everyone you touch

Poisoning your reality with bitterness

And guarding your heart with reservation

Heartbreak will make you want to give up

On people

On love

On life

It’ll bring out your darkest days

It’ll steal your hope and bury it

In insecurities

Fear

And bitterness.

It’ll fill that void with never-ending emptiness

A chasm of apathy, indifference, numbness

You’ll forget what it means to feel

To trust

To love

To believe in something magical

And you’ll convince yourself it doesn’t exist

That you’re destined to experience life of the lonely

You’ll regret ever having met them

You’ll hate them. Despise them. Resent them.

Give me my heart back, you’ll beg

Give me my time back, you’ll plead

Give me my innocence back, you’ll insist

Give me my hope back, you’ll wish

You’ll drive yourself crazy trying to understand

To figure out where you went wrong

To figure out why not you

To figure out what is so incessantly dysfunctional about you

You’ll blame yourself

You’ll internalise

Project

Generalise

Your future will appear glum

Happiness an unobtainable goal

Love an unrealistic fantasy

This nightmarish pain will consume you

Rip you apart, from the inside out

And it will destroy you

In the worst way possible

Because you are still alive

Heartbreak changes you

And not for the better

It brings out the worst in you

It destroys hope, abolishes optimism, and kills love

It’ll make you wish you never loved

Because love wounds

And love scars

And I’m still yet to find a love that heals.