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I DON'T NEED YOUR TOUGH LOVE, I JUST NEED YOUR LOVE

Updated: Apr 11, 2022




i was feeling a bit sorry for myself the other night. it started because i was cut from a professional soccer team...again. and although i was realistic about my actual chance of getting signed, the termination of the process didn't prevent me from feeling tired of being overlooked.


by no means is this a 'woe is me, my life is so hard' plea - it's not. but it's an, 'i'm human too' plea. and part of being human means that you need validation. and validation not just in the form of words, but in actions too.


people offer words because they're convenient. they're easy. they're risk-averse. taking a chance on someone? giving them an opportunity? advocating for them? that takes time, energy, and effort. and i understand those are commodities in scarce supply for many, but they're also commodities which are free. they cost you nothing, but what they provide for another could be invaluable.


and the old school 'tough love' mentality? i don't need it. and i'm sure many others don't either. just because i appear 'strong' or 'confident' doesn't negate the fact that i'm human, just like everyone else. i have needs, just like everyone else. i need recognition, just like everyone else.


so if there's a member of your team or in your workplace who stands out in their ability and actions - don't overlook them. even the strongest people are still people - and all people need validation. they all need love. and they all need support. it's hard to fight your own battles and to be your own advocate. but when you have others fighting with you? advocating for you? all of a sudden that person does feel valued. does feel worthy. does feel good enough. there's power in numbers so how can you be that number to someone? how can you help advocate for them? how can you be their difference?




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